Monday, March 26, 2007

NCAA Tournament Analysis

Although some would say that this years NCAA tournament has been the best in decades, I would beg to differ. It is my opinion, that this year's tournament has sucked. Entertaining yes, but at whose expense? Bracket purists are left to face this years tournament results with a stiff upper lip, and unwavering principle. To have picked these outcomes, is to have lost any sense of respect for your brackets. This tournament has sucked. Like your first second job. Like a soccer team in Alaska. Like a rich kid's birthday party. This tournament has sucked. Some people want nothing more than overtime games and last second victories. Does it matter to them that all of the teams winning are the "#1" and "#2" seeds? No. Does it matter to them that some people spend all year anticipating which 1 seed will lose and what potential 2 seeds might crap their pants? No.

Well, it does to me. Not that I spend that much time analyzing scores and strength of schedule and opponents field goal percentages or anything like that, because I don't. But some people do OK. Goddammit some people fucking do. And maybe if you really understood college basketball and the nuances of the league, you might recognize that an entire year of those people's precious time has been waisted by a field of well balanced, athletic, talented basketball programs that have chosen to play well when it "counts". Bullshit. It never happens. It never ever happens. Whatever. Congratulations on your tournament. It'd be alot cooler with a little more Creighton and a lot more Texas A&M, but who am I to say what makes a better tournament? Oh yeah... I'm Billy fucking Brackets the IV.

So, if you are the jerk lucky enough to win this years office pool, just know that it's because you bet like an immigrant that picked the teams on his son's friend's winter jackets. Or you entered your boyfriend's pool and he forgot to edit your picks before thursday. Or you just "didn't see any upsets this year"?. Right. Idiot. This year sucked. Missouri Valley and the A-Ten and the second ranked team in the SEC West are comin' back next year. Be sure that you pick UCLA, N. Carolina and Florida and Ohio St. every season. Boring. Nerd. Boring nerd. Whatever.

Entry fees are in the mail, shitheads.

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