Valpo

The Christmas game. Or more accurately, the game just before Christmas. I've been going to this for years, as I come back to Madison to greet Saint Nick. The Kohl Center is never quieter. The band had a skeleton staff, the student section was half empty, and the Fan Cam in the Arena twice zoomed in on old men sleeping.

Somehow we outlasted Valpo, despite our ridiculously bad free throw shooting and 20 turnovers. It was one of the ugliest games I've ever seen, but finals and the dull crowd could have played a role. Thankfully we won. Some notes:

Our cheerleaders are ugly. My mom kept saying things like "boy, that 3rd girl from the right is awfully chubby" and "they're not very good looking are they?"

For some reason we employ a 26 year old woman as the towel girl under the basket. She was hilariously outfitted in a blouse, a sweater vest, tight black pants and stilettos. The married gal sitting to my left laughed at all my jokes regarding the preposterousness of it all. Three times during the game after men fell in the lane, the ref blew his whistle pointed at the girl and then pointed at the floor. She would hop from her stool and scamper over to the slick area, get down on her knees and wipe the floor. Then she would scamper back. Please note that by scamper I don't mean "Morency scampered for 12 yards through a few defenders" I mean "28 year old with bouncy breasts has to take fast mini-steps with a stride no longer than 6 inches because she is wearing heels on a basketball court and could easily slip in front of 15,000 people and feel awfully embarrassed. Some questions: Do we pay her? Did she ask for that job? Why is she wearing stilettos? (BTW it was a blizzard Saturday, so it's not as though she walked to the stadium in heels, she must have brought them). So I thought she replaced the 10 year old kids who used to hold that job, but they were still there and would come out during stoppages, so I guess she's the Head floor wiper? Anyway it gets weirder, during timeouts she would get up and join the Badgers huddle. I need an explanation, nobody in our section could understand this.

Early in the first half we had a 3 on 2 fast break and the ball was passed to Leuer on the left flank about 18 feet from the basket. He caught it and flew right towards the basket and slammed on the 2 like he was a pro. There is a little extra awesomeness when it is a goofy looking white guy. 

Brian Butch missed a free throw, it was kept alive by Dakota Joe and then Butch rebound slammed it over everybody. It was the most macho thing I've ever seen from him. For some reason the ref under the basket called him for a charge. The crowd booed mercilessly. Bo looked incredulous. During the post game chat on AM1310, Bo goes "I don't know about that play, I'll have to see the tape, but it looked good to me. How'd it look on radio?"

Jason Bohannon needs more minutes. Please play him more often.